Does Fatherlessness Cause Depression?
This question may seem to be an easy one but I’m going to give my perspective. First I want to tell you, I’m no psychologist or doctor of any kind so what you read on any blog post I write are my research and my experience.
So, the question asks does fatherlessness causes depression and I truly believe it does. Not just because I had my struggles with depression before and I have to say being fatherless had some impact on me feeling that way.
I believe depression in most cases depression is brought on by a myriad of things and not just one thing. People are depressed all over the world and besides meds and going to a psychologist or psychiatrist there is not much help being given to this cause.
What I see in my life and the lives of friends of mine
First of all, my life started off with a very angry man living with us. There were 8 of us being raised by my mother and this alcoholic. He loved to start trouble on the best holidays. We did the best we could to make our life fun for us but we all (my brothers and sisters), had our challenges as adults.
It’s funny that even though we were all fatherless we never paid much attention because it was the norm. None of my mother’s 1st 6 children had their fathers around.
I remember the first time I realized I was fatherless because before this time I thought everyone who looked like me was fatherless. Well, when I was in the military doing some training (M-16 range) and we took a break all I could hear everyone saying is “my dad took me hunting, that’s how I learn how to shoot. Everyone had a “my dad” story except me. It’s a very sad situation when you are the only one without a “my dad” story.
With regard to my friends and depression, I can’t say if any of them were ever diagnosed with depression, but they seem to always be depressed about something. Can you relate? Why is it so hard to kick the depression habit? Can anyone share their story at the end?
What I see on the internet
All I see on the internet are a bunch of sad people who are reaching out for attention. Just a few days ago one gentleman from one of those depression forums, yes I’ve signed up for a few of them, and he said: “would someone talk to me, I’m about to take my life”. I thought to myself, this is a really lonely person, but I can’t say if he was depressed of not, I do know he got what he wanted and that was someone to talk to him. His comment box had at least 25 or more comments, almost instantly. I’m sure he has more comments now.
Sometimes I’ll visit one of the forums to see what’s going on and to be honest it’s very depressing just to read some of the comments. I remember asking several people, men, and women, “where is your dad”, can you call him? Some would say “Who?” Others would say, “I haven’t spoken to the bum in years”. You’ll even get the “I never knew him" phrase. I just wonder, if they had a positive father figure in their life as a child would they still be depressed. I understand someone might say It might be a chemical imbalance in that person, but in everybody?
Another area on the internet where I see a lot of depressed people are on the dating sites. Everyone is searching for something but can’t express what it is. I have come to the conclusion that most of the depressed people on these sites are probably fatherless. I guess the fatherless will find the fatherless and meet and become intimate and have children and the cycle continues.
YouTube is an area where you can see a lot of depressed people and a lot of the depressed are more often than not fatherless. How do I know? I know the signs of someone fatherless. I know they can be argumentative, deflect, irrational and petty. I don’t even need to see a person and I can tell by the way they write if they were raised by a respectful father.
When a YouTuber puts out a new video and it is not to someone’s liking, just read the comments and you can see how depressed the answers are by, of course, a lot of fatherless people.
What I See on Tv
Depression is not hard to find on Tv either. Most of the shows have a depressing plot. There is this one show which I’m sure they are going to say they are trying to help someone and it called My 600lbs story or something like that. Every single person on this show is depressed. In most of the episodes, the person doesn’t show the father in the story. A few do but most of them don’t. Could we be missing something with this fatherlessness situation and depression?
Every channel is filled with negativity, the news, reality tv, even sport can find a negative plot and run with it for days. What’s up with all the negativity? It’s a wonder why we all aren’t depressed from just watching Tv.
Where did all this start in my opinion
For me, it was the wrong man put in place as a child. I was always shy, didn’t have confidence and this could’ve come from not seeing a positive role male model at home. It starts at the beginning. What happened during your beginning that made you feel so depressed now? For personal comments, go to questions from the fatherless.com to tell your beginning in private.
We all had something that made us depressed when we were younger but when did it turn to depression? To think of the same thing over and over again and not have the power to get the real help you need can become daunting.
Where can we get help for this disease?
You can Google “help with depression” and do some research on which company best fits your needs. You can get with a trusting friend and asks if they know anyone, or you can go to The Fatherless Store and click on the “Help” section under the “Store” tab.
Or you can take this free book on depression from one of the companies I work with. Read this book and see if this can be a start for you doing something good about your depression. Click on the image below to get the free book.